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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
26 February 2017 @ 04:56 pm
First tick of the season, no clue how I got it. It must have dropped on me from a tree. It was in my hair. Knowing what a tick feels like without seeing it, is not a skill I wanted to have.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/822005.html.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
22 February 2017 @ 10:49 am
For various reasons I decided to give the purple mattress the week that the youtube commenters insist you need for your body to "get used to it." (Not because they insisted, but because many commenters did say it took them a while and now they love it.)

I'm on night 6. One more to go.

And oh, the pain... last night I said, "sometimes it hard to know the line between perseverance and stupid.

So unless some miracle happens tomorrow, the purple is STILL not for me. There is physically no where for my shoulder to go.

On the plus side, my sleep number is going to feel SO GOOD.

So tired too... Zzzzz.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/821547.html.
 
 
Current Mood: sleepysleepy
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
21 February 2017 @ 08:26 pm
I decided to splurge on a fancy cat tree.

before and afterCollapse )

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/821488.html.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
15 February 2017 @ 09:33 pm
So I posted this oddly popular review of the purple mattress saying that I slept one night on it and it was really really bad. This is how the youtube comment sections mostly goes:

them: "you're supposed to try it for a week at least, the company says so."

me: "I know, but I wasn't just uncomfortable, the pain was really bad."

them: "You still need to give it a week."

P.S. My main channel has only ever "earned" about $2. This review channel has already "earned" $22... boggles the mind and makes me a little sad, since the music takes more effort and thought.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/820858.html.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
06 February 2017 @ 01:02 pm
There are a lot of days when I question that I actually graduated from MIT because my brain doesn't seem to be all that good at things.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/820631.html.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
04 February 2017 @ 11:49 am
I bought a new tablet, even though I thought I shouldn't, because google "upgraded" my nexus 10 into brokenness. I wish I hadn't. I hadn't realized the resolution of the 10 was good enough to out class current tablets and my new one has poor resolution. I think this wouldn't be as much of a problem if it didn't also have a shitty number of colors. Everything looks cel shaded and since I use my tablet mostly to watch youtube, neflix and amazon video, this is likely unacceptable.

I can't return it without incurring a restocking fee.

Anyone want to buy a decent, but not amazing to look at, 10" tablet for $150+tax? Asus Zenpad Z300M-A2

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/820289.html.
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Current Mood: annoyedannoyed
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
02 February 2017 @ 03:12 pm
I got some silcone stretch lids and they sounded so good I made a video.

My negative review of the purple mattress, despite me not posting a link anywhere has gotten more views in the past week than my main channel has gotten all month and has "made" more money than all my other channels combined. I hit on something there and should clearly review more products.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/820160.html.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
29 January 2017 @ 11:32 am
This is going to sound like a post full of complaints. I want to say that these are nice problems to have and more observations and maybe even asking for advice.

The nexus 10 seems to have been desupported by google in a broken state. There are some videos (both in the youtube app and in the foxnow app) that have a point that will cause the whole tablet to crash and reboot. I'm not alone in this problem. I don't want to spend money on a new tablet just because my current one was "upgraded" into brokenness. I guess this means I need to figure out how to downgrade it and what to downgrade it too (it's had this bug for a lot of versions, actually.)

I can't get my twitch stream to be as good as it used to be. The new version of obs does something that doesn't do compression as well as I think I have evidence it used to (with downloads of my old vods.) I've tweaked all the common options, but I think I need to either be more aggressive or, again, seek out an older version. Many people say they are having problems with the new "studio" version that they never had with Classic.

I bought an inexpensive sunrise clock that is supposed to gradually come up from dim to bright, but it's concept of 1% light is almost the same as it's concept of 50% light. I don't really need it to be gradual, but I feel a bit ripped off and I'm still not sure if I shouldn't just return it because it didn't do what it claimed and it wasn't that cheap, just cheaper than most of sunrise clocks out there. Maybe I'll just leave a review.

I posted a review of the purple mattress to youtube. A very short, "not good for fat people" video. I didn't link it anywhere at all and it's not on my main channel. It has more views in the last week than almost all of my other videos. Blows my mind. I wish I had more things to review like that. Maybe I should make a video review of the clock. ;)

Waiting on my new sleep number bed. Not looking forward to trying to get rid of the two old mattresses once it arrives, but looking forward to getting them out of the house.

Haven't gone back to Facebook and while I miss keeping in touch with people, I've heard more of my friends consider leaving because the atmosphere there still isn't healthy. It's been a balance for me to stay informed and stay sane.

My friend who let me perform harp and handpan ant her event wants me to perform with something else, so I'm trying to work something up on hammered dulcimer, but I'm not sure I'll get it together in time. I'm trying to practice a little with my looping pedal, but I can't quite seem to hit the foot pedal without messing up my rhythm while doing it.

I really want to finish another youtube video, but there's been a mix of too busy and making excuses.

TKD remains awesome.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/819732.html.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
22 January 2017 @ 02:58 pm
I tried the purple last night. The purple mattress is NOT for curvy, fat, side sleepers. Worst sleep I've had in a long time and given that sleeping on the floor has not been good for me, that's saying something.

So now I have to decided what I'll order. A cheap sleep number or should I be diligent and look for something else.

I got the king sleep number out of the basement and cobbled together a twin xl set up, so at least I'm back on the platform. It is very much less than ideal, however. It was good to get the king out, however, because it seems to be aging out, so after this has all been resolved, we'll try to get rid of it on craigslist. The other mattress too.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/819504.html.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
19 January 2017 @ 11:14 am
G is trying out a purple mattress right now. We've decided that instead of a king, we're going to try two twinXL mattresses and that way we can each find what works best for us. But because of that, I'm currently sleeping on the old king on the floor.1

Now here's why the post. Just putting the king on the floor has caused me to wake up in more pain. Since we have a platform bed, this isn't the lost of a box spring, so either it's something about the physical elevation (maybe colder on the floor) or something psychological or something I'm not figuring out. It might be that we've worked hard recently to cut the light out for G, and I'm not waking up as smoothly because of it and it's just now catching up with me.

Most animals sleep and I think all mammals sleep and we get very messed up when we don't sleep, so I don't quite understand why it's so hard to get a good nights sleep when you are in a safe place on a soft thing designed for sleep.

1 The plan is G will try the purple, then decide if he's keeping it or not, then I will try the purple and then decide if I like it or not, so it will be a while before we both have a twin XL something that we're trying out. G right now is leaning towards keeping the purple, so that's at least something.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/819201.html.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
18 January 2017 @ 07:24 pm
I recently tried to by checks. The company that the bank ordered checks from (deluxe.com) required my account information before even giving me a quote and then sprung shipping on my that was more than the price of the checks. Then walmartchecks.com sprung a $3 "processing fee" on me just before check out.

Bah.

This entry was originally posted at http://forgotten-aria.dreamwidth.org/819045.html.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
07 January 2017 @ 01:59 pm
DW  
I'm forgotten_aria on Dreamwidth.   I am not sure I like the crossposting setup of giving DW my lj password, so I don't know where  I will post or if I will cross post. 
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
28 December 2016 @ 08:27 pm
This trip to Canada I found myself saying "excuse me" like someone from the states and I felt like I no longer spoke Canadian.  I was driving me batty.

Just as we were leaving a Canadian asked me "How are you?" and when I said, like an american, "fine" without thinking, he called me on it and said, "but it sounds like you have a cold."

So I no longer speak my native tongue.   
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
07 December 2016 @ 12:01 am
Why yes, I know I'm very bad at quiting taiko.

I wrote a taiko song and I kind of like it, but we haven't actually played it start to finish.  We're preforming it next Tuesday.   Whee!

If I like the video, I'll post it here next week.

P.S. I have a new youtube channel for my overwatch videos.  I won't post those here, because it's not really me creating things.  I also tested out doing a twitch.tv "show" today.  Some techinical problems to work out, but I didn't hate watching it back, so that's a win.  (You know how sometimes you can't stand your own recorded voice?) 
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
Here are just a few things I've learned about smoke detectors this week:

Co detectors age out.  Two of ours did so within days of eachother.   The brand I have, despite having a voice, uses 5 beeps to tell you that.  In the middle of the night, you just assume it's low battery and then get confused when it doesn't stop beeping with fresh batteries.  (then you find the breaker, pull it's batteries, reset it and then look up on the Internet what it's trying to say, rather than reading the key on the back of the unit, but it's 5:30am and you aren't thinking so straight.)

Wired detetors will only talk to those of the same brand.   This makes swapping out one of our 11 detectors for something nicer, like a nest, impossible.

Very grateful they still sell our detector.  Hoping it comes soon, since the third is likely to age out soon. 
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
19 November 2016 @ 01:51 pm
I got my bodan today (deputy black belt.) This is the last belt before black, but I'll be working a year on refining the knowledge and getting physically stronger (I'm still missing the ability to pass my 1.5 mile run and my standing long jump.)

I was really looking forward to changing my Fb banner to all my past belts lined up, but since I'm still avoiding FB, I can't do that, so I'll post it here, even though it's not a banner.

belts-20161119
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
14 November 2016 @ 01:37 pm
I had to take a break from FB. It wasn't just being bombarded by the news and politics, but it was that blame was being thrown everywhere and people were shutting down attempts to help and attempts for hope. I know some people need their anger right now, which is why I decided to just stop reading for a bit. So far it seems like an excellent choice, though I'm so used to it being what I do between doing things, it's habit to check (which is also a problem.) I do still want to know what's going on with my friends lives, however, so please tell me what's going on in your own lives.

I wonder if I could filter for posts that have no outside link. It wouldn't avoid all the politics, but it might help some.

Since I don't see many people in person, it's hard to just decide to cut it completely out of my life, but it really feels like an unhealthy thing right now.

P.S. I'm still reading news, so this isn't about shutting out reality.

EDIT: It's been very healthy to not read it, so I don't think I'm going back anytime soon. I have so much more free time too!
 
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
24 October 2016 @ 11:11 pm
I learned how to cast on twitch, then learned you need an average audience of 500 viewers and 3 scheduled shows before you can even display a button that will let people give you money, so that's likely a dead end for making even a trickle of money. I might still cast because it archives the cast and then I can download it for material for any Overwatch videos I make. It was a lot of fun getting it working and testing out my stream. I haven't done a camera overlay because I'm still wrestling with not having audio from the room, since G shares the room with me. If you care, my twitch channel is: https://www.twitch.tv/forgotten_aria

My sister asked me on a last minute cruise, but I had to turn her down. I've never done a cruise and this was going to be 14-days and really the holiday season gets wicked busy very quickly. It was extremely tempting, however, especially since I really want to do one someday.

I got my driveway drain finished before the big rain, but I think the pipe leading from it was over capacity. At least there was no lasting puddling once the rains eased up.

I really wish I liked running more than I do.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
17 October 2016 @ 05:09 pm
I promised I'd post new youtube videos here. I got a new intrument, a Xaphoon and proceeded to make a duet with my soprano sax.  I'm not very happy with it, so instead I made a "here's my new Xaphoon" video with some noodling.  If I get some time, I'll try the duet over.  Is this against my promise to post things that aren't perfect. I don't know.  I'm still allowed to have a line, no?

I haven't been making time for making videos.   A lot is just being busy with things, but mostly it's because I've been enjoying playing Overwatch a lot and haven't been making the youtube making a priority.  Though perhaps waiting until I really want to be doing it isn't the worst thing in the world.

I bought the Xaphoon as a possiblity for something to play in the rain for School of Honk

So what is a Xaphoon? It's a pocket saxophone.Collapse )
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
09 October 2016 @ 11:10 pm
This was my first time performing at honk fest.  I skipped most of Friday, except for tune share, which was a little disappointing, but was a good test run for my new method of carring my instrument.

Saturday's weather was great.  We had a "open rehersal" where we taught anyone who wanted songs while the audience watched.   It felt weird to be "performing" our teaching, espeically since it was different than a SoH practice.  Our set, though, in the evening, was one of the best we've ever done.   At the after party, they rehersed a song for the "saxophone choir" to perform the next day.   It felt so amazing to have  a group of near strangers come together and practice something for an hour and have it performed the next day and it sounded GREAT, at least on the inside.

Sunday was super rainy.    They told the woodwinds to not try to parade with our instruments.  So with the magic that is School of Honk, they handed me a trombone and said, "here, parade with this."  Now I've blown a trombone for about an half hour before and not much else.  So here I was parading down the street learning as I went.  By the end I had a collection of notes I could get confidently.     I was completely soaked, however.   I went to staples, bought some plastic bags and elastic bands and handed them out to any woodwind player I met.    

By the end of the day I was soaked, cold and tired, but it was still totally worth it.

Now to decide if I'm going to RI tomorrow for one more day of Honking!
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
24 September 2016 @ 05:23 pm
With hulu shutting down its free service, I once again wanted to look for a cheap dvr.  The well known names (TIVO)  want to sell you a scheduling service which drives the price far out of my budget.   Surely there was something out there that would just act like a VCR but record to a hard drive?   Turns out, yes, but  it was hiding under "converter box."  There are a few different choices.  $30 got me this.  It take a USB flash or hard drive and will take an antenna signal (but not cable, but since I'm a cord cutter, that's fine.)    I spent a bit more on getting it a dedicated flash drive.   Interestingly enough it has a program guide for the next 24 hours, but you can also just set it like a VCR.  It's a bit klunky both in the UI design and in the responsiveness of the remote, but the record quality seems decent and the price point is right where I need it.

It turns out that our pressing need for it has gone away, so I likely won't testing it as hard as I was hoping, but I'm very glad to have finally found an affordable solution and thought I would share it incase other cord cutters had been looking as well.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
16 September 2016 @ 05:09 pm
The weight machine is gone (after a comically tough time getting it out because we were trying to avoid disasembling it entirely.  Hind site, disassembling it would have been easier.)  (I have also polised the gash out of the floor. it's still visitble, but not as glaring.)

The elliptical is down stairs!

The new machines are ordered! 
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
15 September 2016 @ 01:43 pm
G and I are likely going to get a new weight machine and elliptical soon, but first we have to get rid  of the old ones.   Someone is coming to see the weight machine today, but the elliptical is a bigger issue, partly because it's heavy enough that we can't carry it down the stairs without risking our backs.    We also can't transport it easily.  The play it again sports might buy it if we can get it to them.

I'm hoping the new weight machine will make me use it more because it's a nicer machine in a lot of regards, but I also hold no disllusionment in how I opperate.

I've been also thinking of upgrading to a better DSLR that can also record movies and there's a good used one right now, but I can't seem to pull the trigger.

I've not been making videos, partly because of just things going on in life (the walk and taiko is just not letting me go), but also because video gaming started to become more of a priority for me.   I have two videos I really want to make, I just need to force myself to cut out some time for it.

I also have to get back to having lunch with friends  I don't see often enough.

I'm also hoping I'll carve out some time to get kayaking on my pond once this season.

I also have to dig more holes in my lawn beforce it gets too cold.

And I need to start running again on days that are not stupid hot.

In TDK I'm learning the 8th poomsae and I really like it so far.  I need some TDK pictures.

I am trying to get back to going to SoH regularly, espeically with Honk Fest coming up.

I've been toying with the idea of making a website advertising myself as a handpan player, just because it's good ambiance music and no one will ask me to play a specific song on it.   I don't know how good/bad and idea this would be.

My new therapist continues to be awesome.  She's also very enthusasitc about helping me.  Apparently she gets to give me homework she doesn't usually give out. 
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
11 September 2016 @ 12:11 am
Last Sunday School of Honk went to george's island and wandered around with two other bands (including ENSM) and we kept bumping into eachother.   A very pleasant way to spend and afternoon.     I cannot say enough how cool SoH is that it is super causal way to have more music in your life, but still a nice way to get out and about and perform too.  If you want more music in your life with very little pressure or commitment, I highly recomend it!
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
29 August 2016 @ 04:55 pm
Sometime after we moved in, they paved our walk. In the middle of the walk was a drain. The walk sank and the drain was floating above the path and was less than useful. We also have a low point in our driveway, so I decided the best way to remedy this was to get someone to dig up the asphault walk and for me to dig out the drain, replace it with a lower one and replace the walk with pavers.

This became a WHOLE lot more expensive than I had imagined. But I got it done, and while I was sore and discouraged, so far it seems to have come out well enough. Time will tell if I've bad the base stable enough and if the issue where the walk is now a little low compared to the stairs will be annoying.

I learned there is this new cool paver base stuff that saved me digging out and laying down 4-5" of rock base. I also tried using the polymetric sand for the joints. I'm also really happy with the stones I choose even though they were quite expensive and I was forced to buy way more than I needed. Getting the curve was harder than I had imagined to, but I did get away with not having to make any cuts. I did chip of one corner to fill a hole.

picturesCollapse )
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
27 July 2016 @ 09:12 pm
Been a little busy with the trip to Pittsburgh to help my mom buy a car and then Black Ships.

Taekwondo is doing well. This weekend I test for "high brown" which means just "deputy black" before black. In a lot of ways I'm really glad the master convinced me to not try to black this year. I means I can be more mellow and I'm forced to come to terms with the "maintenance" part of TKD, which is to say, after high brown, the amount you learn per year goes way down and you are expected to learn things with more accuracy and precision. I am such a passion driven person, though, sometimes I have to remind myself that TKD just makes me feel better and it's completely worth doing just for that reason and the other carrots are just crutches. I'm doing something that improves my quality of life and that's enough.

I put myself on a waiting list for a therapist again. They called back today and I have introductory appointment this Friday. I know it's going to be completely different this time, because I'm in a very different place. My depression, while still existent, is much better than it was. I want to work more on my anxiety and paranoia, which I feel I can get advice on and maybe some more tools in my tool kit, which feels more like something that someone else can help with. But we'll see. There are a lot of horrible therapists out there and the ones that take new patients are more likely to be the ones with high turn over.

Taiko is... odd. I definitely have the "you can't go back there" problem. I really don't feel like I belong any more to the group or to the community, but I'm still quite active and doing many of the income producing jobs. I can't say I want to be doing them, but I still can enjoy them when I have to do them. We're struggling to find students, however, and that's stressing me out. I'm currently teaching pro bono just because I was tired of canceling classes and I like my students.

I made another Overwatch themed music video. I've been slow about posting music videos lately, partly because I've been busy enough and partly because since it's not yet an income source, I want to keep it relaxed and fun. My first overwatch video has done much better than anything else I've posted, which is cool, but still just in the noise as far as income goes. I'm also not that happy with this one. The song didn't quite come out the way I was hoping, but the idea is that I need practice making music and videos. Video.Collapse ) I've also been playing a lot of overwatch.

No new instruments. I am getting another USB controller for Ableton tomorrow.

I haven't been able to hit school of honk much lately and I'm having ear inflamation that I think is caused by earplugs, so I might have to skip again. I got some new ear plugs that are cheap self moulded ear plugs and I hope they'll help some, but we'll see.

Been enjoying the AC comfort of the new house. Reminding myself one of the reasons I moved out of 133.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
28 June 2016 @ 11:12 am
I have to take my car back AGAIN. They assembled it wrong and two pieces of plastic are touching that shouldn't be and they're fighting with each other.

I woke up yesterday with this pressure in my ear, half my hearing being muffled and this constant low noise that got worse when other low noises happen. The constant low noise seems to be gone, but I'm still missing a good part of my hearing in my right ear.
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Someone I am is waiting for my courage
13 June 2016 @ 01:10 pm
Just some notes about the weekend.

Found an awesome image for my button with Chun Li and Okami on it.

At archery they had one left handed bow but we were all righties in the group, so I tried the left handed bow and gave myself a huge bruise where the string hi my elbow. OW!Collapse )

It was fairly cool, so I didn't think I'd get a chance to swim. It was a little warmer on Sunday, so took my suit to the beach, but it seemed too cold. So I went kayaking and my pocket (which one would think was enough in the kayak not to do this) spat my camera out into the lake. So I decided if I could try to get it, put on my suit, swam out (the water is less cold when you have a mission) but the water was too cloudy (from pollen and other things) so I couldn't see the bottom well enough to hunt for it. I worry now that the camera battery will leak something bad, so I feel more bad about that than losing the camera itself.

There were pollen clouds so think you could see.

I saw a woodpecker going to town on a rotten log that was on the ground. It let me get pretty close. I took photos, but they were on that camera that's now at the bottom of the lake.

I had a good time, despite all that.
 
 
Someone I am is waiting for my courage
05 June 2016 @ 05:22 pm
C-max started overheating again... ARG! Getting a new car was supposed to make things more reliable.

EDIT: they are trying many things, but can't get it fixed. Now they think they won't have it back to me before Friday.
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