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01 February 2004 @ 03:40 pm
A party without the birthday  
So my birthday is sometime in the next 6 months and I've been thinking this year I really want to have a party. The problem is most years I don't want to have a party or really anyone to notice or care, so I'm a little protective of the date of the actual birthday. So I'm curious if there is some way I can have a party that would still attract people as if it were my brithday without it actually giving away the date, or do I loose because I'm overly protective of the date? Or am I being stupid and should just stop hiding the date?
unintentionally intimidatingcoraline on February 1st, 2004 01:37 pm (UTC)
i don't really understand why you're protective of the date, so i'm not sure i can comment usefully, but i think a "everything but the birthday" party would work (i.e. cake and singing of "a very merry unbirthday") and would probably attract people, but you'd have to explain in the invite why you were doing this and i don't know if that would defeat the point for you.
Someone I am is waiting for my courage: susuwatariforgotten_aria on February 1st, 2004 01:54 pm (UTC)
Explaining wouldn't hurt stuff for me, I just think that people might be less likely to show up. I don't know.

I'm protective of the date because I don't like people saying happy birthday to me. I don't like people making a big deal out of something that is esentially "congradulations for continuing to exist." Usually this is true. This year it's not though. I think because I'm happy to celebrate me for once. I think normally it just makes me feel inadiquate.
unintentionally intimidatingcoraline on February 1st, 2004 09:20 pm (UTC)
again, i don't really understand the motivation about the birthday thing here, but i understand these things are important.

i think if the invite says "i don't do birthday parties, so this is an everything-but-the-birthday party. please celebrate my unbirthday!" people will be likely to treat it with the same importance as a birthday party.

or at least i will :)
David Krikorianexponentialdk on February 1st, 2004 02:09 pm (UTC)
I think you should get right to the point, and announce a Happy Cat Day party, celebrating another year of us all being happy to have Cat. Some people might confused that with a feline-themed party, but you could combine that, too, if you wanted.
(Deleted comment)
Someone I am is waiting for my courage: eternal darknessforgotten_aria on February 1st, 2004 02:17 pm (UTC)
My parties have had very low turn outs over the past 2 years. (~10 people.)
Someone I am is waiting for my courage: catwitch shadowforgotten_aria on February 1st, 2004 02:25 pm (UTC)
Including last years attempt at a secret b-day party.
katybeth on February 1st, 2004 02:44 pm (UTC)
1) Some friends out here have held Birthday parties that were in honor of everyone attending who "has had, or will have had, a birthday" that year. Interesting, anyway.

2) If you just want to be protective of the date, you could have a birthday party on any arbitrary day and say "I'm celebrating my birthday, which is sometime in the next 6 months." You may get the Happy Birthdays and such at the party, but probably not outside it since people wouldn't have a date.
the man who sailed around his soul: Me - Profile w/sunglassestcb on February 1st, 2004 04:41 pm (UTC)

I think letting people know the date, and also giving any caveats that make you feel comfortable (re:wishes, gifts, etc) is perfectly acceptable.. but I expect it would help people to know if they can make it or avoiding scheduling other things if they know the date..
Someone I am is waiting for my courageforgotten_aria on February 1st, 2004 07:18 pm (UTC)
Why do I need to let people know the date of my birthday to have them reserve time for the party? B-day parties almost never land on the actual B-day.

Also, I expect most years I don't want to have a party, so I don't wany my friends to make that gap in their schedule.
katybeth on February 1st, 2004 07:49 pm (UTC)
*nod* I don't see any reason people need to know the date of your birthday. They do, however, need to know the date of your party. :)
Fashionable, but unable to tell fact from fictiontesting4l on February 1st, 2004 09:02 pm (UTC)
I don't blame you. I hate telling people when my bday is. Less so this year because of relsqui.

I think the in-the-general-area-of-a-birthday party is a fantastic idea for those like us.
The Water Seeker: kidletplymouth on February 1st, 2004 10:02 pm (UTC)
One year in high school I held my birthday party 6 months after my actual birthday. Because I wanted to take people canoeing but the canoe rental places aren't open on my birthday. and then summer came and my friends were all busy with summer camp and family vacations and there was no time to hold a party when they were all free. So it happened in october. I never hid the date of my real birthday though. Just saying I have no problem whatsoever with birthday parties that don't fall on or near birthdays.