When the expectations exceed happiness of the holiday, there is something wrong. Why can't people be pleased with what they have and get, than disappointed that you didn't do exactly what they expect?
My sister and I have a present truce, and that suits me just fine. I would rather I get nothing, than some stupid cented bath set that is a desperation gift that I have to worry if I insult the person if I secretly give it to good will.
When/if it becomes your time to host the festivities, try to spread the feeling that every visit, every gift, every smile and every laugh is not tken for granted. It's a special thing that doesn't just happen because the calandar is marked with some words.
Yes, most holidays happen every year, but that doesn't mean that the people you share them with and the moments that you get from them will always be there. Cherish those things you have and don't pine for those things that you don't. Don't put stress on the people around you when they fail to meet your expectations, or better yet, hold no expectations and be pleasently surprised by anyhthing wonderful they do for you.
And now to try to live by my own words and try to enjoy the good of being here.